It’s cold again, which means we went out again to check-in on our houseless neighbors. Eric and I were able to convince 10 people to come inside tonight, including this adorable puppy named Maximus. He belongs to a man who told us that he is a veteran with PTSD. Maximus is 4 months old, and nearly purebred German Shepherd. His owner hopes to have him trained as a therapy dog. They, along with another man who lived with them, were super grateful. His friend called us angels sent to save them. He told me that they were nearly out of food and hadn’t been able to venture to a store because of the cold.
We only discovered them because some other houseless folks told us where they were. Unfortunately, they did not come with us. I did have a good discussion with them though they ignored me at first. They thought I was from a different shelter, and because they had a bad experience there did not want to talk to me. Conversations like these have made me very conscious about this work. Building relationships, providing good services and caring about people for more than one day or one night is really important.
So often people ask us which shelter they are going to before they decide to come. The last few times I've been out I have taken snacks and water. Many folks I encountered who turn me down need it. It’s made me acutely aware that there are things we can provide on nights even when it is not below freezing. I’ve been thinking a lot about how to maintain the relationships we’ve made and the connections we’ve cultivated with the homeless communities in North Oak Cliff and Oak Lawn this winter.
Half of the people we took in tonight we’d picked up before. Several of them popped up and told us they were ready to go as soon as they saw us. A few even asked why we didn’t come out last night (before it got cold this morning). Even though it's heartbreaking to see people living on the street, it is like seeing old friends and I enjoy checking in on them and seeing that they are still doing OK. Tonight we did discover that a few folks we usually check on are no longer there. A gas station we usually find them at had some sort of private security car in the parking lot that never used to be there. It was a reminder of the vulnerability of these communities. I worry about what happened to them and wonder where we can find them.
Despite this set back I was able to show Eric a few new camps I’d found. We’ve really uncovered quite a few communities. Although we are hopeful that this is the last cold night of the year, I’m going to miss checking in on people.
I’d really like to find a way to continue serving them. I don’t want them to think we abandoned them; I don’t want to abandon them. The relationships we’ve built are important and I want them to continue. One of the reasons people are so reluctant to come with us is because they don’t trust us. Some don’t understand our inconsistency. Many are struggling with their own traumas. My hope is that if we can find some sort of way to do year round outreach, then we will be more successful next year; save more lives.
Two of the people we picked up tonight revealed some of these challenges. A woman I wrote about a few weeks ago — the one who threw away the blanket we gave her — finally decided to come with us. Our consistent checking on her, the fact we brought her blankets and food, and the familiarity she had with us opened her up. She realized we cared about her, she thanked us, and was willing to give the shelter a chance. Another woman we picked up off of the street really hesitated to come. She told us she didn’t like churches. She also told me she didn’t like asking for help; she said she was raised to be strong without relying on others. I chatted with her for a few minutes, reassuring her that our only agenda was to give her a warm place to sleep so she didn't freeze to death. We promised her that we weren’t going to preach to her.
This kind of reassurance is part of making people understand that all are welcome and that our compassion doesn’t come with strings attached. It’s also part of understanding the different types of trauma they are living with and trying to meet them where they are. I’ve personally never been overtly evangelical about my faith. I’ve tried to let my actions reflect my compassion for others. When we do this work as a church, we’re doing something similar. We are showing that our compassion is not limited only to other Christians; that we care about everyone and that our love for them is unconditional.
I’m so glad I’ve been able to do this work this winter. I’ve learned a lot about Dallas, about people, and about community. I’m looking forward to warmer weather and finding ways to build upon the foundation we’ve built.
Dr. Andrew McGregor
KPUMC Member
